eight years ago, i shared an instagram photo of my bookshelf on my then-new account, @twirlingpages. it feels magical and nostalgic to know that eight years has passed since then. (hello???) while i no longer blog (consistently) anymore, it feels right to create a blog post commemorating this day.
in chinese, the word/character for “eight” sounds similar to the character for “fortune” or “prosperity.” because of this, i want to share eight things i learned during my eight years online:
01. your relationship with the internet will change
this feels obvious but i still needed to say it. i don’t know why my younger self thought everything would be the same, but life changes and so do you. particularly, how you see the internet, social media, and internet spaces will change. aging makes me more jaded and the same is true here. (lol) i’m not saying “i hate the internet!!” but it is no longer the sparkly magical place it was for me when i was a teenager. and that’s fine! there’s depth and complexity. i can love internet spaces while acknowledging that they can be toxic and nuanced. they can also bring the most magical friendships and memories.
02. you will still feel like an amateur
i know this is true for me, but maybe not for others: i still don’t know what i’m doing! i suppose that is part of adulting. when i was younger, i thought i would magically understand and know when turned a certain age. i would feel certainty in my choices. NOPE. if anything, i feel more confused than ever! (this sounds like a cry for help but i am sincerely fine…. this is just my daily existential thought™) i believe adulting and growing up is being comfortable with not know what you’re doing. but this is incredibly refreshing because there is so much more to learn! you make mistakes, move on, and continue trying your best.
03. it’s okay to do things for enjoyment
it’s ironic because i started this space as a place where i could share my hobbies and interests (mostly reading at the time). however, i quickly got overwhelmed with the numbers, analytics, and the idea of success. but now, i’m realizing it’s okay to not have a schedule, to not pressure yourself to do certain things for the chance of “better” numbers, and to simply enjoy the time i have here. your happiness is incredibly valuable and more than enough.
04. don’t underestimate the power of internet friends
i mentioned this towards the end of the first bullet point, but internet friends are so wonderful!! i’m incredibly grateful for the friendships created thanks to this space. however, friendships (online or irl) evolve. if you’re no longer as close to a friend, that’s okay too.
05. it’s okay to take a break (or break up)
i’m not the best at saying no or setting boundaries, but i’m working on it. however, if you don’t set boundaries, you may be stretched too thin. honestly, that’s a bit how i feel about blogging. i set challenging goals that were out of my bandwidth and i got burnt out. then, i did the same for instagram and youtube. however, i’ve learned my lesson and am getting back into the swing of things. on my own (healthier) terms.
06. your tastes will change
much like the first bullet point, things change. but specifically, your tastes and interests will change. when i first started this blog, i was very #bookstagram and devoured YA novels like no tomorrow. now, i no longer read as much as i used to (which was hard to accept at first). i’m passionate and interested in wellness, sustainability, film, fashion/style, and more! i still read, but no longer only YA. my current favorite genres are literary fiction, fantasy, essays, and young adult from time to time.
07. you have an abundance of time
the older i get, the more i feel like “i’m so old!!!!” or “i’m too old for the current internet trends!” *stares at tiktok*. but the truth is, i’m really not old. i have my entire life ahead of me. in the scope of the internet, i feel that this fear of aging is related to one’s relevancy. i’m no longer relevant in the spaces i occupy. that may or may not be true, but those spaces change and so do you. (see: above.) if i wanted to keep creating, i could because i want to do it for myself. if i wanted to stop, i could as well. there is space for it all. [repeats in affirmations]
08. creating this internet space is one of the best decisions of your life
i suppose this is for myself, and also those who are considering starting a blog/instagram/tiktok/youtube/whatever. i’m so so grateful for my past self for having an idea to do this and actually following through. it’s not as scary as you think it is, and it’s much much more rewarding than you can imagine. it’s not a constant uphill ride––there will be MANY struggles––but it is definitely worth it. cheers to internet spaces!
thank you for being part of this journey! whether you started following me eight years ago or today, i am forever grateful for you!!!! i hope you have a wonderful year <3
really felt like i grew up with you! this is pretty crazy but.. i’ve been following you for 8 whole years now, since the good ol’ bookstagram days :’) i usually never comment on anything because i’m shy though >,< i still remember your old posts, i think i literally still have a screenshot of some your posts from like 2015-ish instagram era in my old ipad somewhere. you were my favorite bookstagrammer & definitely one of the reasons i started to love reading more! oh man, we were all obsessed with YA novels back then lmao. also now i always look forward to your new yt videos:)) thank you for everything and happy 8th birthday twirling pages !!! 💛